Everyone's been posting non-crappy journals lately.
Except for me.
Yes, I am in Office Productivity again. What? I finished my quiz early.
I hate the keyboards they have on these stupid Dell computers.

Urgh, I hate that you can see all the finger grime on the piccolo photos. That's kind of my fault. I should clean them better. But anyways.
Sigh.

I know I put up that 'oll', but I'm really probably not gonna color that for a while.


But I really, really have to work harder in life.
I have to do my homework so my grades can go up.
I have to do better on my history tests.
I have to do more character drawings, studies, and comic pages for practice.
I have to get better.
At everything.
If I'm not good enough, then I can kiss my art-school dreams goodbye.

Damnit, why am I never good enough?
My mom wants to take me out of APUSH. But I want to keep trying.
Every time I actually want to try harder, she shoots me down. She brings up irrelevant past experiences and 'just knows' that I'm going to repeat and mess up.

Why should I do any better if she 'knows' what's going to happen? It's so stupid. And when I actually DO better, she just goes, "See what happens when you try?" and just embarasses me and makes me feel stupid.

Way to go, mom.

But I really want this class, so I'm gonna keep going. I know it doesn't 'do anything' for my grades, but I don't care.

I just have to keep trying, always trying...

I really want to go to an art school in England, too. I know that probably won't go through, but I want it, I do...